Greeting the morning from my porch

gazing at the drought-yellowing leaves

highlighted by the rising sun

without a whisper of breeze to move them

muted calls from geese in a practice formation

flying toward the dark western sky

signals of the changing season

I realize how deeply saddened I am

by the growing distance and silence between us

work is my only solace

as it has been through the years

now especially so during these troubling times

of ever-increasing confusion and fear

looking deeper within for strength and vision

to keep walking this “lonesome valley”

Grateful for the privilege

to sit peacefully at my computer

while others flee from bombs,

fires, floods, and devastating storms

*

Grateful for small things I can do

to make the world a little kinder

by sharing the bounty my gardens yield

with those who wait in line for food

*

As the beginning of the fall semester draws near, I find myself remembering “The Clicker.”

If you haven’t read this old post, you might find it interesting. The post describes one of the encounters I had during my years working as a faculty member in academia. I survived those years by writing fieldnotes and reflections to record what I witnessed and experienced. For obvious reasons, I couldn’t share what I wrote then. One of the reasons I began blogging about six years ago was to finally share some of the stories. Although I did my best to remove all personal identifiers, one person did recognize a few of the protagonists since she, like me, was a target of theirs because she was different.” Today, one of those experiences came to mind and inspired the following reflection.

*

as she stood by the cutting board

slicing up an old apple

before it finally became too rotten to eat

she found herself once again

looking back at her social awkwardness

chuckling about petty colleagues

who thought they were

meting out punishment by

ostracizing her from their social gatherings

when in reality, from her perspective,

they were actually sparing her discomfort

from the meaningless small talk

she would have had to endure otherwise

*

*

I am truly grateful that I retired early and now have the gift of a position teaching groups of diverse, amazing students with the support of competent, supportive colleagues. But it’s time for me to get back to the apple before it turns even browner…