October 9, 2021
Dearest Mother, I remember
sitting beside you
as you struggled to breathe
on your last day of life
October 10, 2010
I am not sure if you heard me
or recognized that the person beside you
was your daughter
gently stoking your thinning silvered hair
telling you I loved you
letting you know I was grateful
you could finally be free of pain
although I would miss you deeply
for the rest of my life
*
Beloved Mother, I remember
the photos I discovered
that you lovingly arranged in albums
chronicling the seasons of your life
the sometimes forlorn little girl
raised on the reservation by an aunt
until you were taken by federal agents
to be shamed for your heritage
in the process of being “saved” and “civilized”
by priests and nuns
in the Catholic “Indian” boarding school
where you were placed involuntarily
without your family’s or community’s
consent or approval
You survived nonetheless
and lived a life
that made the world a better place
because of skill and compassion
that your healing presence
Graduation from Loyola University
Owner and Administrator of Keystone Nursing Home visiting with residents
*
Community Engagement
*
brought into the lives
of all those who knew you
***
October 11, 2021
Sorrow sometimes surfaces suddenly
revealing buried grief
that we believed had been resolved
with passing time
Long life leaves losses
that accumulate through the years
as we say so many goodbyes
to family, friends, furry and feathered companions,
and our youthful dreams of what could have been
Reflective resilience reveals rewards
described in a poem …
“After a while you learn
That even sunshine burns if you get too much.
So you plant your own garden and decorate your own soul,
Instead of waiting for someone to bring you flowers.
And you learn that you really can endure…
That you really are strong,
And you really do have worth.
And you learn and learn…
With every goodbye you learn.”
(original by Jorge Luis Borges, perhaps modified by Veronica A. Shoffstall who is often attributed as the author)
*
The final resting place for Cookie, Pinto and two aged willows
***
October 14, 2021
Light sometimes makes its presence known
on the dark and rainy days of autumn
in ways that are surprising
golden leaves that glow despite clouds
or the kindness of virtual exchanges
about topics that are boring to most
which somehow trigger unexpected insights
that help one look back with gratitude
on a long life well-lived
I clearly see your mother in you. Your poems and the other well captured the feelings of this season for me too. And I love that tree in the last photo, is that near your home?
LikeLiked by 2 people
Thank you so much for your thoughtful, lovely comments, Skywalker. The tree is in Enger Park (https://duluthmn.gov/parks/parks-listing/enger-park/), not too far from my home. The park is on the western ridge that overlooks the city and Lake Superior to the east.
LikeLiked by 2 people
A poignant and powerful tribute to your mom… Thanks for sharing. 💞
LikeLiked by 2 people
Thank you so much for your always thoughtful, lovely comments, Bette. Sending my gratitude and best wishes to you. 💜
LikeLike
Moving words and wonderful images. I’m so glad you have those photographs to keep.
LikeLiked by 2 people
Thank you so much for your thoughtful, lovely comments, Diane. I look forward to reading your new book! It arrived a couple weeks ago, but classes and the last days of harvesting and yardwork have kept me too busy to do much else. 💜
LikeLiked by 2 people
My Mama, or a friend of hers, might have taken me to that park. I began school in Duluth. I loved my kindergarten school but had to change for first grade. Had to leave my first best friend there in third grade. So Duluth and Lake Superior hold fond memories for me.
LikeLiked by 2 people
Thank you so much for sharing such lovely memories and an important part of your history, Skywalker. 💜
It’s where my grandchildren spent their childhoods, and has been a home to Ojibwe people for hundreds of years after they displaced the Dakota (https://www.ecolibrium3.org/land-acknowledgement/).
LikeLiked by 2 people
A beautiful and heartfelt tribute to your mother, Carol ❤
LikeLiked by 2 people
Thank you so much for your kind and lovely comments, Ros. 💜
LikeLiked by 1 person
A beautiful, warm post Carol that fills my heart with so much love. Thank you.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you so much for your kind and lovely comments, Michele. Sending my gratitude and best wishes. 💜
LikeLiked by 1 person
So moving and affecting. I am moving my 94 year old mother into assisted living as I type so I relate to the complexity of feeling.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you so much for sharing such lovely, thoughtful comments, Cindy. Sending hugs. 💜
It is such a difficult decision and transition. I felt a great deal of guilt when I moved my mother to an assisted living center, even though it was the best option. She had Alzheimer’s Disease and required an increasing level of care during the 14 years she was there. I remember the relief I felt when I visited her on her first morning after the move. She was seated at a table with three other residents. They were engaged in a lively conversation, repeating stories. Yet each time a story was told and retold, it was new and interesting to the group, no matter how many times it had been repeated. I was grateful she was surrounded by others who could help her feel valued.
Sending by best wishes to you and your family. 💜
LikeLike
Beautiful.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you, dear friend. 💜 You have been in my thoughts. I love your recent posts and look forward to having time to communicate through our virtual campfires once again. Until then, I send my gratitude and best wishes to you.
LikeLike
🥀 I’m sorry.
I would call your mother a sacred warrior. I would call her daughter, Carol, one, too.🌷
(And what lovely verse.)
LikeLiked by 2 people
Thank you so much for your kind words, Under the Mask. 💜
LikeLiked by 2 people
Carol, so beautifully written, with so much love. Thank you for letting us share this sensitive and deeply wise life.
Miriam
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you so much for your kind and lovely comments, Miriam. Sending my gratitude and best wishes to you. 💜
LikeLike
May her love and yours forever travel in the universe.
hugs, Eddie
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you for sharing such lovely reflections, Eddie. Sending my gratitude and best wishes, dear friend. 💜
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you for your precious words
LikeLiked by 1 person
💜
LikeLiked by 1 person
Sweet friend, I needed a good cry and you gave me one. I send you love from a distance always…
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you so much for your always thoughtful and supportive comments, dear friend. Sending love to you, too. 💜
LikeLike
❤ ❤ ❤
LikeLiked by 1 person
So touching, so poignant. I can feel the love you have for your mom. And i recall my mom as well, and everything she did for us. Thankful for having read this wonderful tribute, Carol. Hugs.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you so much for your thoughtful, lovely comments, Charly, and for sharing some precious memories about your mother. Sending my best wishes. 💜
LikeLike
Thank you for your beautiful tribute; it made me tear up a tad. Remembering similar circumstances with my own mother. But also what yours went through–nothing short of kidnapping and brainwashing–but she blossomed and added to the world instead of only taking from it. Amazing.
LikeLiked by 1 person